|
I remember lying in bed cursing your name...shouting"why"and tearing your words to pieces..I was surrounded by darkness,and my last breath was on me...My enemies had won,all I could see were demons...and I welcomed the end...Then you came...and sent the demons running...You confronted me...it was painful,but i confessed..and you offered me hope...Then..as I traveled,the sun was shining on my face in the evening..you showed me the beauty of your creation,I felt your love and strength,A power stronger than any. Remember when I called to you in the desert?Underneath the brightest stars,and asked you to show yourself to me.Then you came to me early the next morning and spoke of the love you have for me and the sacrifice you you made to save me from my own death...I felt unworthy..I closed my eyes and wept..and was grateful...when I opened my eyes I saw you everywhere,in the trees..in the mountains..over the water...my eyes could barely comprehend such beauty.. You armed my family with love,to fight my enemies when I was weak....you gave me strength..and taught me to love..and be loved...You opened my eyes to the illusion id lived for so long...though I may not have liked all you taught me...you held my hand and said"Dont worry,this is neccessary for your happiness"...I trusted you..and you saw me through...and after all of this..I still ask more of you..When I grow impatient,and feel I deserve more...may you never let me forget laying in that bed..soul dead and body dying..and always be grateful for the priceless miracle you gave me...I have nothing to offer in return,but this letter of thanks...Its not much,but sincere...and if anyone asks why im alive today ill tell them.."Because you want me to be".May I look to you for guidance the rest of my days.Lonnie
Sometimes He waits for me to come back,but He never leaves.
|